Accruing Confidence

Nov 3

Alright, alright. A new day to vent and ponder and act! A new day to use these pages to let out some angst and let in some clarity.

I have put in my request to become a contractor for Yoga on High.

I have put in my request to cancel this stupid Saturday class that was dumped on me.

The universe has helped me out hugely by allowing FIVE 6am classes in a row to be no more (probably ever).

I already feel infinitely better and my relationship has vastly improved. To be back on my regular schedule is incredible. Up and moving before 8am, staying up as late as I'd like.

I've had a full night's sleep almost every single night for almost two weeks and I feel like a whole new woman.

Everything is working out. I've decided I have no desire to teach "Power Yoga" at a gym anymore. Not my style, not my thing. What a relief that Arena District asked me to give up Power Yoga and switch it with Spinning at 6:35pm. Perfect.

Now I have all my playlists built and can get an amazing workout in at a great time on Tuesdays. Bonus.

Everything in its right place.

It is all working out, and now I am intentionally setting out to do what I've always known I would do… I am stepping out into being a true blue entrepreneur and it is phenomenally exciting and scary all at the same time.

My negative self-talk has been extreme the last few days. I am so hard on myself. You are such a piece of shit. You never finish anything. You drive people crazy. You keep fucking up. You'll never make it.

There is still this self-sabotaging undertone to much of what I'm doing, though this is a vast improvement from what this once was.

Again and again I get older and learn more. I am ready to slowly shift my life to be what I want. I am getting much more secure in knowing what I need. It is nothing less than empowering.

I completely control my decisions. I have this thing called "God" or the "Universe" that seems to be on my side.

Life is cruel and sad and all sorts of fucked up, but there is an overwhelming beauty and sweetness as well.

I live for the sweetness. The beautiful emotions, the sunsets, the presence of people you love. Breathing the fresh air, smiling. All is wonderful as is.

What do we choose to notice? What do we intentionally avoid?

Think of yoga as an awakening, an awakening inside yourself.

Think of reading and lectures…….

Yes…

Open up these doors and fucking fly honey.

YOU GOT THIS.