Creating Lasting Productivity
Put your phone on Do Not Disturb. Flip it upside down on your desk, or better yet, put it in your desk drawer.
Who creates the boundaries of your life? You, right? Or so you'd hope?
Working for yourself is a dive into the wide open unknown, and at last your tendencies and traits all coalesce to reveal your potential and pitfalls.
I have sustained myself as a "solo" entrepreneur by surrounding myself with handfuls of other professionals in my industries, working closely with other entrepreneurs and business owners.
I don't look at myself as beneath anybody, and that is where I believe genuine confidence and competency stems from.
That, and a good week with Leaves of Grass by Walt Whitman might be all it takes to shift your mindset and sense of self-worth.
I am as bad as the worst, but, Thank God, I am as good as the best.
I'm no better than anybody either. Whatever is "godlike" or special about me is the same substance as anyone I meet.
I have the potential to be as terrible or as incredible as any human I meet.
Maybe not in their unique way, but in my own.
I've failed at a LOT of things in my lifetime. A LOT. But in comparison, my failures are a mere drop in the ocean compared to the mostly successful and prosperous aspects of my life.
Knowing when enough is enough.
Can you appreciate what you have right NOW?
Phone on DND, flipped upside down, in the desk drawer. Respond to people when you want to. I refuse to be tied to a device that can reach me at all hours.
DO NOT check your emails first thing in the morning. DO NOT turn on the TV, jump into Facebook, or absorb the energy/information/crappy attitudes of others first thing in YOUR morning. Whatever you do: meditate, make coffee, review an old journal, write out your goals and dreams… give yourself some space to bask and shape your day. This was life-changing for me.
Have a huge mess around you? Consolidate your mess! This is one of a billion brilliant things my mother has taught me about home-making and organization. Grab a bin and consolidate all the chaos into one place or stack. Everything else is clean, clear, and peaceful. You have one place to clean up.
Know what you own and why! I can't stress enough how powerful I find it to continually get rid of old crap and baggage.
Don't feel obligated to take every ounce of advice you are offered. Even this! If a few things strike you as helpful and insightful, by all means, surge forth with some helpful tips! But seriously learn to trust your own instincts. My greatest example keeps coming back to people who push what works for them on others.
Allow yourself to be a Creator and an Editor, and don't worry if you can't be both at the same time! Take turns!
A couple analogies come to mind. One is this: my creative self wants to make messes and think new thoughts and leap down rabbit holes and take chances and play and imagine. My editor self wants to furrow my brow and delete all that seems stupid in hindsight, scanning with meticulous attention to detail, searching for potential flaws and finding ways to improve.
I used to be in such conflict with myself over this inner divide until I realized that these two sides can come out when they feel like it. They can be totally different and think the other is totally obnoxious (so sloppy and childish! so uptight and regimented!) Let them both be.
Again and again I'd read about what debilitated writers: the incessant editor criticizing as you'd write.
It's taken me YEARS to master the murky ground of rough drafts and messy-ass beginning stages. It's not pretty. In fact, it's usually pretty damn terrible.
Stop letting a great tool of yours go to waste by bringing them in at the wrong time.
It's like getting drunk and then trying to be as formal, coordinated, and put together as possible. You just took a couple shots. Know is the time to let loose and roll with that playful and vivacious energy. Let your inner critic sulk in a corner while you have a good time.
Then lastly, stop being a bully to your inner critic just because they can be a bully to your childish, artistic side. You both need each other.
Mending the split within ourselves is where the work of changing the world comes first. If you are at war with yourself inside your head, good look having prosperous relationships with others. If your own is a hot mess and you can't find peace and solace by yourself don't you think you'll be demanding a whole lot of unconditional love from another person who probably can't satiate a need that YOU yourself can't satiate?
That's my way of looking at it at least.
Versus: here's what I did, feel free to do whatever works for you! Don't feel pressured! Take what you love and leave the rest.
My example is people who push early morning classes on people. That is AMAZING (truly!) that it works in your schedule and life to wake up before five in the morning and get your workout in. Good for you!
When I first started out as a yoga teacher, I taught Monday through Friday across Columbus, waking up at 5:15am. I did this for well over a year, mind you.
I have always naturally woken up around 8:00am - 9:00am and gone to bed around 12:00am or 1:00am.
I genuinely value a full night's rest and it is my most underrated way of sustaining success and ample energy.
Many yoga teachers didn't begin teaching until students began to seek them out. Finally, they'd say, they knew it was time was share their knowledge because people were straight up asking them to.
Though to me I may seem like I'm fumbling through owning my first (and hopefully only) lifelong business, the amount of women and men alike who have reached out to me for advice on living an authentic life was astonishing. You're asking me?! I'd think, shedding bi-weekly tears over the amount of money I didn't have, the amount of security I didn't feel I had.
My stubborn determination to be financially self-sufficient came from a lifetime of living with entrepreneurs.
It only took two years of going to a babysitter for my mother to realize that she did not want to leave me with others. She changed her work schedule to 9 - 3. She walked me to school, she walked me home. She had each Friday off of work and in the summers we would make long lists of yard sales and spend our mornings driving across country lands looking for bargains.
The amount of love I've received is overwhelming.
Spoiled is an understatement. There has been so much good and so many blessings in my life it is hard to comprehend or feel deserving of. Who was I to receive such a prosperous life of love?
I was someone whose cup had been filled enough to be spilling like a waterfall over the edge.
Now I feel it is my duty, my dharma, my purpose to give back to as many people as possible.
Thus, Peace to the People.
Word to my mother for bringing her deep love, care-taking, home-making
I come from a long lineage of incredible mothers.
My Hungarian great great grandmother who died in her early thirties, leaving four children behind.
My great grandmother who came to America at age seven, the mother of seven children.
My grandmother, the mother of five children.
My mother, with me.
One of my parents' greatest sadnesses was not being able to have more children and provide me the experience and built in comradery of siblings.
I absolutely attribute this to my life-long quest to be really and truly Great, a force of nature willing to be the best of the best to make them proud. If you only get one child, I'll be the best I can be for you.
My parents never expected that from me.
How to have an over-achieving and successful child? Love, support, encouragement, time spent teaching and educating, rules and standards, but very little pressure.
No force. When the time is right.
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